Understanding the
Masculine & Feminine Energies
To clarify, the masculine and feminine energies are not limited by gender (or sexual orientation) because we all embody BOTH energies.
However most of us (roughly 80%) have a natural, core energy - primarily masculine or primarily feminine.
When we learn to honour that energy, and truly own it, we create more polarity (fireworks & passion!) in our intimate relationship. Not only that, but our whole life tends to take on an ease and grace when living in alignment with our natural essence.
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Problems often arise in relationships when the energies are reversed, or when one partner is not living/being/acting according to their core energy.
Essence & Main Drivers
Masculine
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The masculine is driven by a sense of purpose or mission. Life is often about achievement, freedom, solving problems or overcoming challenges. If a masculine male lacks direction in life, deep down he will have a sense of "unease" or irritability (his testosterone levels will also be lower).
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The masculine essence is defined mostly by "doing."
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Masculine energy focuses on one thing at a time (task-oriented).
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Feminine
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The feminine is inspired by love and connection. The feminine is most alive and radiant when she (or he) is connecting, sharing, emoting, communicating or receiving.
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The feminine essence is defined mostly by "being."
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Feminine energy is fluid and can focus on many things at once (relationship-oriented).
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The need for connection is a primal force in the feminine; whereas the need for freedom is a primal force in the masculine.
True love will honour both needs in a healthy dance – time together, time apart.
Primal Calls
Feminine to Masculine -
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"Will you be there for me?"
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"Can I trust you?"
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"Am I your priority? Do you cherish me?"
Masculine to Feminine -
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"Will you support me in my work/mission?"
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"Do you appreciate my efforts?"
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"Am I enough? Am I your hero?"
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True Masculine
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unwavering presence (like an oak tree)
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clear direction & purpose in life
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embracing & non-reactive
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holds space for the feminine
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in touch with emotions (without being needy)
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leads with conviction and clarity
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assertive, not aggressive
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serves & protects the feminine
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acts with honesty and integrity
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seeks freedom for fun & rejuvenation
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faces difficulties with courage
Wounded Masculine
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detached and unavailable
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life filled with distractions & addictions
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defensive and abusive
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holds space mainly for self interest
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emotionally illiterate; cold & distant
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wishy-washy and indecisive
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filled with anger or frustration
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uses the feminine for pleasure
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lies, cheats, has secrets, unfaithful
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seeks freedom out of fear
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avoids responsibility & self-awareness
True Feminine
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playful & radiant; shares her vibrance
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fully surrenders and flows
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in touch with her intuition
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open, authentic and vulnerable
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supports the masculine on his path
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comfortable with space and freedom
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expressive and emotional (without being hysterical)
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nurturing and compassionate
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full of self-love and self-confidence
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connects with lots of people
Wounded Feminine
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moody and frequently sad/blue
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insecure and needy; easily attached
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full of criticism and complaints
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manipulative and inauthentic
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controlling of the masculine
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fear of loss and abandonment
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drowning in her emotions
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waiting to be rescued or saved
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stuck in victimhood
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socially isolated and fully dependent on the masculine
When couples start to appreciate the differences between the masculine & feminine...
it's like starting afresh.
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All of a sudden, you see your lover through a new lens.
Are you more masculine or feminine at your core? Not sure?
Don't feel bad. You're not alone. In fact, when asked, most people aren't sure. Certainly wasn't covered in high school.
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Yes, free. And no email required.
